The more that I am consistent, the more I can find the resistance from myself. What is it saying?  What’s the path forward?  Is this resistance internal or external? I am going to be taking note of it. 

Where I have been meeting resistance has been internally. It starts to manifest in anxiety.  That leads into the fear of I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.  Then it’s followed closely by our good friend, the imposter syndrome.

I have been working hard on my universe and my internal voice for a lot of years and it’s still a fight. That fucker shows up to remind me of how I’m not good enough, or qualified, or how I’m going to embarrass myself. It digs deep into the fabric of who I am.

It’s easy and annoying to feel like even with all this work, we’re still here. Easy to feel like we haven’t made progress on that confidence part.  But truthfully I am light years ahead. Some things that used to create the same anxiety were competing, and speaking publicly at my current job or my last.  Now a lot of those don’t even get a rise of anything anymore, other than excitement to perform and showcase my best. 

But I look at when that RESISTANCE comes in, what can I pinpoint about it?  It’s big projects that scare me. It’s the same way as leading into a world championship. That “anxiety”. Let’s start reshaping our relationship with that.  This is simply energy.  Use it to battle. Don’t crumble and hide from it.

That energy of showing up means things are important to me and how I feel about the success or failure of it matters.  I want to grow and do incredible things.  More importantly I want to show people that you are capable of building a life you love. It won’t be comfortable. It means you’re surrounded by things you honestly give a fuck about.  I don’t want the opposite side of anxiety, which is utter indifference. 

So when resistance pops up, I know that’s the thing to get better at.  I have a few right now. 

Making sure I get my morning routine done.

Cardio  - learn podcast

Sauna  - write journal

Cold plunge  - breathe

This sets me up for a ton of success for the day.  I come in focused on the task and razor sharp after some time moving and gathering my thoughts before things start.

Make no mistake, this morning routine has some rad physical benefits.  But the athletic or physical performance side is only about 30% of why I’m doing it. 

It’s getting ready for some intense chaotic life and travel.  This year is going to challenge me on a lot of fronts.  Organization and focus will help. 

I have three 10 year dream projects currently running at the same time.  I am excited and scared.  Good.

That means I am not living my days on autopilot.  It’s that resistance from me and my goals that challenge me to improve.  I don’t want easy.  I don’t want comfort.  I want to push myself. 

I keep hearing that voice that doesn’t want to get up.  The one that says deal with it later.  The low whisper of what if we fail? 

My two options to shut that voice the fuck up are this.  Abandon this path. Or get at the wheel, tell that voice to STFU.  And do the work. 

The cardio, sauna, and cold routine is the start. It says “we go now” .  If I can’t do the simple things for my success that require no magic, I can’t trust myself to perform when unexpected opportunities arise.

I will meet them head on with a heart full of fire and confidence knowing I FUCKING SHOW UP FOR ME.

Where do you find resistance from yourself when chasing a goal? 

Seek resistance

Abandon comfort

December 18, 2023